Adrianne Palicki Boobs Might Save G.I. Joe Retaliation

Rumor has it, this G.I. Joe movie has been sitting in a can for many years now. The release date has seen more bumps than Paris Hilton during a work play vacay in Medellin (that was a fucking reach). It’s been delayed at least a year, if not two, which is typically not a good sign for an expensive tentpole movie like Joe. Can Bruce Willis save it? Probably not. Those days are over and this looks like another one in the loss column for The Rock. But, there is Adrianne Palicki. She’s hot. And she knows this film’s in big effin’ doo-doo so she showed off a ton of cleavage on the red carpet last night for the film. As if showing off your tits is some magical fix-it for life’s problems. That is only most of the time, Adrianne. This film’s in trouble.

Photo Credit: Getty Images / Splash News / WENN / INFDaily.com


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See Lily Cole’s Boobs in New Yeah Yeah Yeah’s Video

I dig Lily Cole. She’s a redhead (a nearly sure sign that someone’s down for butt sex, trust me) who likes to show her boobs. Fuck what some feminists say, women have as much right to show off their tits and be sexual as they do to wear turtlenecks and save themselves for the one God has chosen for them.

Lily stars in the Yeah Yeah Yeah’s latest music video for Sacrilege, where townsfolk burn her alive for being such an awesome slut. The video retrospectively shows the lovely Lily away running from the mob in little blue undies, boobies bouncing. We’re shown her getting jiggy with various men, a reverend, even a woman. That’s not not hot. The best shot of her glorious breasts is around 02:47. You can’t see any nipple in the video, but if you feel the need for inspection, click here (NSFW!) and see that the carpet most definitely matches the drapes.

I’m sure the Yeah Yeah Yeah’s had an artistic reason of some sort for burning the town whore, but it sure sets a dangerous precedent. For long stretches of history, towns burned their most wanton women. And what did they get? Towns that sucked. You know where they don’t burn whores? Vegas. And Vegas is awesome.

Here’s a look at some hot photos of Lily Cole, in case you don’t know who the fuck I’m talking about…

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Halle Berry Boobs Never Age

Halle Berry doesn’t have real tits, but she has spectacular tits, which is more important than real. What truly is real in this world? Organic food? It’s grown with shit, literally. Reality TV is entirely fake. The last bout of ‘real love’ I experienced ended in her sleeping with my favorite bartender (the worst, because you can always find a new girl, but finding a new favorite bartender is a pain in the ass). There is no real. Just good and bad. And Halle Berry has good.

Photo credit: FameFlyNet / Splash News


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Kaley Cuoco Still Has Admirable Boobs

I used to love Kaley Cuoco. But something is happening that I’m none too pleased with. Kaley Cuoco is getting less hot. I’m thinking maybe it’s me. Perhaps you can only stare at a woman’s chest for so long before you become apathetic to her looks. I’d like to think not, but that could be some male-mating predisposition to keep the genetic pool diverse. Or maybe Kaley’s just getting less hot. She’s showing her boobs more lately, which could be a sign she’s sensing the same thing.

Photo credit: Getty Images


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Bootcamp for Boobs Skincare & Exercise, only 4 minutes a day for 30 days to Love Your Boobs

The main support system for holding your boobs UP is your skin so if you worry about sag, droop, crepe or gravity, this kit is for you. Lift, tighten and firm your skin and lift, tighten and reshape the muscles beneath for double-whammy results in only 4 minutes a day. If you commit to applying 2 layers of high performance skincare and 4 minutes of exercise targeting pecs, biceps and triceps every day for one month, you (and your partner) will be amazed at the difference.

Bootcamp results:
? Boosts your pecs, lifts your boobs, defines your cleavage
? Keeps skin firm, youthful, plumped, fitting you like a glove
? Anti-aging effect on neck and décolletage - zap the turkey neck
Contains:
4 minute bust-perking exercise programme by celebrity trainer, Efua Baker
Tummy Toner improves texture and tone of your skin.100ml/3.4 fl.oz
Boob Tube award-winning bust cream; firming and super nourishing. 100ml/3.4 fl.oz

Price: $99.00

Click here to buy from Amazon

Four-Year-Old Girl Sports Fake Boobs and Butt, Wins a Prize for It

Oh man, we really, really hope we can stop writing about “sexy” children soon.

The Daily Mail reports that on a recent episode of Toddlers & Tiaras a four-year-old contestant sported prosthetic boobs and a padded butt, then promptly wiggled and shimmied on stage for a Dolly Parton routine. Interestingly enough, the costume was inherited from her mother, who also wore it when she was a toddler and competed in beauty pageants.

The most shocking/scary thing about this story, though, has to be that the little girl, named Maddie, actually took home the prize for “Best Fashion.” This is particularly horrifying considering the amount of outrage that French child model Thylane Blondeau and that French children’s lingerie line garnered stateside. I guess it’s not just the French after all…

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