Check Out Paramore's FREE New E-Book, 'Writing The Future'!

Download Paramore's new book, "Writing The Future." It's FREE!

Maybe it's time we instituted an Oprah-like book club around here, but instead of all the books being tear-jerking/life-changing/heart-smashing novels, they can be stories about/written by our favorite rock stars! First up in our totally unofficial book club is Paramore's new e-book, "Writing The Future." Oh, and in case you're the type of person to say something like, "I have more important things to spend my hard-earned money on" (who are these people, BTW?!), all y'all can rest easy, because Paramore's book IS FREE! But no, there are no CliffsNotes.

That's right: The "Now" singers aren't just dropping new tunes, videos, and a new album (due April 9!) -- the band recently broke the news on Instagram that "Writing The Future" is officially available for download on iTunes. Inside, Paramore Stans will find a story about the band's new album, exclusive photos, and even a video filmed during a recording session! GUYS, we're SO excited to have some new spring break reading... even if there isn't a chapter called "How To Make 'Still Into You' Shadow Puppets." Can't win 'em all.

Download "Writing The Future" here!

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Buzzworthy Obsession: Dark Horses, 'Alone'

Dark Horses list a photographer as one of their band members -- and now we're obsessed.

We probably shouldn't be surprised that the video for "Alone," the first single from the Brighton, U.K. seven-piece Dark Horses, is so stylish -- what would you expect from an act that has a photographer listed as a member of the band? A photographer's attention to detail runs throughout the clip -- it's all hair, leather, and lipstick, which finds singer Lisa Elle brooding decadently while a model runs throughout a studio hung with oversized prints of iconic figures. But it's not all about aesthetics -- Dark Horses sound as good as they look.

Watch Dark Horses' "Alone" video after the jump.

"Alone," taken from Dark Horses' upcoming Black Music, out April 2 on Last Gang, is a stripped-down, bass-forward slice of reflective gloominess; if the band's name, album, and song titles didn't tip you off already, this is some darkly spun material. "There is only one real antidote to the anguish engendered in humanity by its awareness of death: erotic joy," the band has said of the album.

While "Alone" hinges on a tight bass groove, other songs on the album, like "No Dice," are more haunting and psychedelic, with a persistent buzz of feedback, and delay-heavy guitar lines that drip like running mascara. It's a musical dichotomy that puts them in good company, with compatriots like Kasabian, whose singer Tom Meighan shows up on the slow-building track "Count Me In."

Stream the album, produced by Death In Vegas' Richard Fearless, in its entirety here.

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PLEASE Let Justin Bieber's Monkey Be A Real Thing! (PHOTO)

Please oh please tell us that Justin Bieber has in fact adopted a monkey.

Could it BE? We already knew that Justin Bieber had a thing for animals judging by his owl tattoo and pet hamster (R.I.P.), but this photo of him cradling a baby monkey in a blanket is JUST TOO MUCH. Now we're totally dealing with an onslaught of "AW" and "PLEASE GOD LET JUSTIN BIEBER'S MONKEY BE A THING" thoughts and feelings. We also can't figure out who's luckier here: Justin holding the monkey or the monkey being held by Justin. It's truly a toss-up.

Music/film producer Jamal Rashid aka Mally Mall uploaded the adorable monkey pic to his Instagram with the caption "OG MALLY FIRST PIC WITH HIS POPS

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New Video: Tyler, The Creator, 'IFHY' (NSFW)

Tyler, The Creator plays with dolls in his "IFHY" video.

We can't even begin to imagine the things Tyler, The Creator has come up with as the director of Odd Future's music videos. With his twisted humor, raw emotional vision, and musical talent shown in clips like "Sam Is Dead" and "Domo 23," it's clear he's got some major cinematic ambition going on. In his new video for "IFHY," the latest from his upcoming album, Wolf, Tyler plays a doll (with full-on plastic makeup) in a toy playhouse with a lady figurine he can't seem to shake. Basically this is like if Barbie's Dreamhouse was a Nightmarehouse or if the toys in "Toy Story" belonged to Sid instead of Andy. SOMEBODY POISONED THE WATER HOLE.

Watch Tyler, The Creator's "IFHY" video after the jump.

Sitting in a cloud-painted dollhouse, a plastic-faced Tyler is having a major mope attack about an emotionally distant girlfriend. He gets a chance to explain his "I love you but I hate you" feelings to his girl (also in doll form), even going so far as to break down the dollhouse bathroom door to get to her (which isn't scary at all). Tyler doesn't have any more time to explain his feelings, however, because his owner starts melting his face with a lighter (see what I mean about Sid from "Toy Story"? Somebody get Tyler outta there!). Finally, Tyler -- in doll form -- is sideswiped by, who else, Tyler, The Human, driving a green muscle car as the song switches gears from "IFHY" to "Jamba." So, what's Tyler trying to say here? That he's getting "burned" by a girl? That love hurts? That he's getting...."played"? OK, OK, we'll stop.

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Jermaine Dupri & A Mystery Chick Have A Dinner Date In L.A.

Does Jermaine Dupri have a new chick in his love life?  Check out his L.A. dinner date last night inside...

Record producer/rapper Jermaine Dupri puffed on his cigar as he left a restaurant with a mystery brunette Terrence Howard's ex-fiancee actress Zulay Henao in Los Angeles last night:

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Mariah Carey without Makeup and Other Internet Gems

Mariah Carey’s new fragrance Dreams launches next week at Kohl’s, and to generate some free publicity, she posted a picture of herself “without makeup” (wink) on Instagram with the caption “Love to all the lambily!!! #WWLD.” But wait, it gets even better than “lambily.” Mariah told Hollywood Life:

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Katy Perry Makeup How-To

If you want to nab Katy Perry’s signature makeup look, don’t waste your time with foundation and powder. All you need is a little drywall mud and a putty knife, maybe a trowel if you’re having trouble smoothing out the edges. Then set your look with one of those UV lights dentists use to cure sealant when filling cavities, and voila — Katy Perry!

Four better ways to do foundation:

Bobbi Brown mineral makeup is triple-treated with glycerin and vitamins to diminish the look of imperfections and fine lines. ($39)

Lancome Teint Miracle makeup has 10 years of research behind it and 7 international patents pending. Love this stuff. It’s currently my favorite foundation. And just so you know, it’s pronounced “taunt miracle,” not “taint miracle.” ($40)

Dior Diorskin Airflash Spray Foundation was inspired by the airbrushing techniques used backstage at fashion shows. ($62)

If you’re just not a foundation kinda girl, Laura Mercier’s Radiant Primer evens skin texture and is so light you won’t even feel it there. ($32)

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Scott Thomas rounds on UK film directors

By David Millward

3:48PM GMT 29 Mar 2013

The bilingual British born actress, who is now one of the biggest stars in French cinema, told The Daily Telegraph, there were major differences in the film industry on either side of the Channel.

Scott Thomas, 52, had a simple explanation why she was offered more rewarding roles in France than in Brtain.

"That’s just my age. Because they don’t want leading ladies that are over 50. It’s the truth! It’s the truth!

"I’m still asked to do leading roles in France, never in the UK. Never ever. People will ask me why, and I don’t really know apart from this idea that in France people are less afraid of older women, or getting old. Why is it in Anglo-Saxon culture that age is a taboo?"

The actress has lived in France for decades, having moved there to work as an au-pair at the age of 19.

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Kristin Scott Thomas: 'The French are less afraid of older women'

29 Mar 2013

While she gained major recognition in the 1990s for UK films including The English Patient and Four Weddings and a Funeral, in more recent years she has been given major dramatic roles in French films including I’ve Loved You So Long, Leaving, Sarah’s Key and In Your Hands.

Her belief that French directors cherish older women more appears to be underlined by the continuing flourishing careers of Catherine DeNeuve, 69, and Fanny Ardant, 64.

Francois Ozon, the director of her latest film, In the House (Dans la Maison) agrees that the French have a different approach to films and older actresses.

"Because for us, cinema is first an art, we’re not really obsessed by the commercial success of the film,” he said.

Recalling the success of Under the Sand in 2000, which starred Charlotte Rampling who was by then in her mid-50s, he said audiences were moved to see an actress of that age could still be sexy.

“In England, you have the feeling that with women after 50 you don’t have sexuality any more, or if you have sexuality you are a nymphomaniac."

 Film newsNews »UK News »Celebrity news »David Millward »

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Ali Larter Has Even Tighter Jeans

Right there’s the thing women will never fully understand about men. The hottest woman in the world is always the next woman we see. Doesn’t matter if Sex Incarnate came through before, whatever vision of womanhood follows, is always the one we want. And, yes, awesome amazing loyal husbands that you brag to your friends about feel the same way. They’re just good at overcoming their primal instincts. Or they’re very good at lying. Either way, even if they had a sweet piece of Maria Menounos, their eyes would be wandering to Ali Larter the minute she stepped on by in tight jeans. There’s seven billion of us on the planet, there used to be two (hey, I’m old school). That growth curve doesn’t come about with a dick that settles down.

Photo Credit: FF


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See Lily Cole’s Boobs in New Yeah Yeah Yeah’s Video

I dig Lily Cole. She’s a redhead (a nearly sure sign that someone’s down for butt sex, trust me) who likes to show her boobs. Fuck what some feminists say, women have as much right to show off their tits and be sexual as they do to wear turtlenecks and save themselves for the one God has chosen for them.

Lily stars in the Yeah Yeah Yeah’s latest music video for Sacrilege, where townsfolk burn her alive for being such an awesome slut. The video retrospectively shows the lovely Lily away running from the mob in little blue undies, boobies bouncing. We’re shown her getting jiggy with various men, a reverend, even a woman. That’s not not hot. The best shot of her glorious breasts is around 02:47. You can’t see any nipple in the video, but if you feel the need for inspection, click here (NSFW!) and see that the carpet most definitely matches the drapes.

I’m sure the Yeah Yeah Yeah’s had an artistic reason of some sort for burning the town whore, but it sure sets a dangerous precedent. For long stretches of history, towns burned their most wanton women. And what did they get? Towns that sucked. You know where they don’t burn whores? Vegas. And Vegas is awesome.

Here’s a look at some hot photos of Lily Cole, in case you don’t know who the fuck I’m talking about…

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Oscar Pistorius Bounces

Cyborg probable murderer Oscar Pistorius was granted permission by a South African judge to travel overseas and compete. You’ll recall that the world famous Olympian was accused of shooting his girlfriend…. four times. According to Oscar, he thought she was just a super hot home invasion robber. Oscar was allowed out while his trial was set up but can now pretty much go about his life like before. It just goes to show you that things are the same all over the world. If you are rich and famous you get away with murder, sometimes literally. I say not only should this motherfucker not be allowed to leave the country, they should take away his fancy space age blade legs. Give him two wooden peg legs like a pirate and see if he can hobble away from justice. It’s rough, but less rough than being shot four times by the dude who you’re sleeping with.

Here’s model Reeva Steenkamp who Oscar Pistorious shot, four times, just to be sure she wasn’t getting up again.

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Amanda Bynes is Good at Hiding

Amanda Bynes, International Master of Disguise, was hiding in plain sight in New York’s Time Square with an invisibility cloak over her basketball sized face while wandering around yesterday and I’m sure no one noticed. Oh wait yes they did…

…the What I like About You actress looked like she was pretending to be a ghost while a second eyewitness notes that she was walking into things because she couldn’t see.

Maybe she’s trying to hide from Drake after shooting her mouth off on Twitter about wanting him to plow her. You know even a soft rapper’s gonna collect on a pussy debt. I’m sure a better disguise for walking into shops in New York City would be a ski mask and sunglasses. Armed shop owners in the city always love that look. It’s about time we read about Amanda Bynes and a crime where she wasn’t the perp.

Photo credit: Splash News

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Petra Benova Gets Bum Rushed

What happens when you’re a hot ass bikini model and you go to the beach with your friend and she’s got a nicer butt than you? You cap her ass? Tip your cap? Or just hope nobody is around with a camera? Model Petra Benova clearly got fucked on the latter when she met up with her girlfriend on Miami Beach and both girls took to pointing their butts in the direction of a photographer, who captured the two rumps side by side for comparison (Petra on the right, friend on the left).

Petra Benova has an ass you would not throw out of bed, let alone ever get into bed. But her friend, yep, it’s better. Probably just cost Petra a few modeling gigs. Bitch.

Photo credit: FF / PCN

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Candice Swanepoel Does Another Hot Photoshoot (VIDEO)

By Lex

I was locked in my bathroom innocently checking out Candice Swanepoel behind the scenes of yet another sexy photoshoot when I got confused by the virtual entry of a bunch of male models. Not confused in the way ten-percent of young boys get confused in middle school when they realize they like watching Glee. I mean, confused as in, why the fuck do they ruin a perfectly good female photoshoot with a bunch of topless dudes?

I don’t envy male models. They have to suck a lot of dick to work their way up the chain. They have to do tons of stomach crunches. I don’t want to have to do either of those things, which is why I chose not to enter that particular profession. Coincidentally, that profession felt the same way about me. Why a dude wants to be a male model, short of the very few who make a ton of dough, I don’t quite get. But mostly I just want them to go away and leave Candice videos alone.

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Vanessa Hudgens Bra Peek

Sometimes, when a girl shows her bra in public, she’s sending a message that she’s promiscuous and sexual. And in the other 99% of times, she just didn’t dress properly. But it’s so much more fun to imagine the one-percent. Not to say Vanessa Hudgens isn’t a sexual attention veteran, what with the cell phone pics of her barely legal cooch she transmitted right about the time Disney had a myocardial infarction, and her follow up ode to toplessness. Still, while my mind is imagining her body language belting out ‘ready to mount’, it’s still more likely her bra saying ‘stop shopping at Ross, you cheap bastard’.

Photo Credit: FlameFlyNet

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Chumlee Got His Girlfriend A New Pair Of Tits To Show Her He Cares

Love don’t cost a thing,but fake tits can cost upwards of five grand. And that’s the price you apparently have to pay if you look like Chumlee from Pawn Stars and want to sleep with someone who looks like his “girlfriend” Tanya, and that’s on top of paying for a dinner for her and ELEVEN of her girlfriends among other things.

Sources close to Chum tell us, the perky new breasts were a recent birthday gift for his gf Tanya — but that wasn’t all he got her.

We’re told Chumlee also rented out a penthouse suite for him and his lady at the D Casino hotel last weekend, paid for several lavish dinners at the hotel’s Andiamo steakhouse — including one attended by Tanya’s 11 girlfriends — and even arranged fancy limo rides through Vegas for her and her family.

- TMZ

Chumlee seems like a nice enough guy, but for his sake I really hope Rick and the old man pay well enough to pull in a new Tanya after this one shows off those new assets, and ends up part of some NBA baller’s bad Vegas romp or the next Waka Flocka train. I don’t know, I just get that feeling that she’s the type of chick that just…I think you played your cards a little too early on this one big guy. That’s all I’m saying.

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The Man With The World’s Largest Dick Feels For Jon Hamm

Mad Men star Jon Hamm, seen above at the Season 6 premiere with his harem, has been pretty pissed off lately that people can’t seem to stop talking about his dick. It’s not like he’s furious that people are obsessed with his large member, but he thinks it’s an invasion of privacy because when he became an actor, he didn’t sign on for this. Because if there’s one thing that guys just can’t stand, it’s women wanting to impale themselves on their flesh swords.

There’s one guy out there who gets what Hamm is going through, and that is Jonah Falcon, who claims to have the world’s largest penis at 13.5-inches. Somewhere a black guy is laughing.

“I’m willing to bet his problem is his balls,” Falcon told The Huffington Post. “Balls cause the most bulges. His penis is not going down his pant leg like mine.”

Falcon has been known to wear bicycle shorts to accentuate the goods, but other times he takes pains to distract attention from his crotch by keeping his wallet, keys and other objects in his pockets.

“I prefer constriction myself,” Falcon said. “As you get older, your balls drop and need support. If it’s his penis that’s causing the problem, he can point it up like European men.” (Huffington Post)

Falcon obviously hasn’t seen the infamous picture, because the problem isn’t Hamm’s balls. If anything, it’s the thin material of his pants. He should try wearing something a little thicker, like six pairs.

Who cares what the man with the world’s largest dick thinks, though? I’d rather hear from the woman with the world’s largest unnatural breasts, Chelsea Charms. And by hear from her, I mean I want to stare at her gigantic breasts.

(Photo Credit: Getty)

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New Video: Ariana Grande Featuring Mac Miller, 'The Way'

Ariana Grande flirts with Mac Miller in their "The Way" collabo video.

How's that for speedy service? Just when we were like, "OMFG we are fully digging this Ariana Grande and Mac Miller 'The Way' collabo, where is the video???" -- it appears! And only a day later, too. Honestly, it couldn't have come sooner, because we were getting a liiiiitle bored of wondering whether or not Mac was gonna try out some of his "Love Lessons" on Ariana. Well, he totally did, and they TOTALLY WORKED. Also, what better day is there to premiere your music video than the day after your song snagged the No. 1 spot on the iTunes chart?! It's a Passover miracle!

Watch Ariana Grande featuring Mac Miller's "The Way" video after the jump. 

In their "The Way" video, Ariana and Mac are in full flirtation mode -- can you blame them what with that sample of Big Pun's "Still Not A Player?" -- with Ariana dancing seductively in a sea of balloons while Mac takes her picture. As Ariana dances and sings about how much she loves her man, she and Mac share the the occasional kiss and cuddle (and by "occasional," we mean "never-ending"). When all is said and done, Mac's feeling PRETTY DAMN proud of himself. Let's face it: We'd feel proud of ourselves, too, if we successfully charmed Ariana while wearing a GIANT Cosby sweater. Seriously, props to any bro who rocks the Coogi and still gets the girl. Hey -- good enough for Biggie, good enough for you.

Be on the lookout for Ariana's "Victorious" spin-off, "Sam & Cat," when it premieres on Nickelodeon this fall.

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Video Premiere: Guards, 'Ready To Go'

Guards depict a retro coming-of-age story in their ultra-stylish "Ready To Go" video.

If washed-out pop trio Guards seem vaguely familiar to you, it's probably because they remind you of experimental pop pair Cults ("Go Outside," "Abducted") -- frontman Richie Follin is actually the brother of Cults' Madeline Follin AND used to play guitar in Cults (now excuse us while we ponder the ridiculous amounts of cool in that gene pool). But it's been a minute since we heard anything from the long-haired NYC outfit -- Guards debuted three years ago with their eponymous 2010 release, but now the group has reconvened with a sophomore album, In Guards We Trust, and a new, impossibly retro video for "Ready To Go."

Watch Guards' "Ready To Go" video after the jump.

Shot in black and white, "Ready To Go" is a peek back in time, featuring a group of kids in, oh, the late '50s/early '60s, who are hangin' out, eatin' ice cream, playing "Spin The Bottle," necking, swimming, and just generally having a very photogenic coming-of-age experience (if only our own puberty years had been so attractive). Guards aren't visible in the video, but their celebratory vintage rock jam creates the perfect backdrop for this alternative "Leave It To Beaver"-inspired (or maybe more accurately, "Pleasantville") diorama. It might be a few years since our OWN prepubescence, but consider us "Ready To Go (Wherever Guards Are Going)," too.

Guards' In Guards We Trust is now out on Black Bell Records.

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Star Spotting: Please Welcome The Return Of John Mayer's Cowboy Hat! (PHOTO)

Sup, John Mayer's cowboy hat? We've missed you!

Sometimes we like our men kinda scruffy, so we had exactly ZERO qualms with John Mayer's "Imma pretend to be a cowboy and rock long hair and my cowboy hat 24/7" phase. And guess what? We're not even a little mad that John whipped out his cowboy hat out yet again last night while heading to dinner at famed L.A. eatery Craigs.

You see, John's cowboy hat situation comes in phases. After some extensive research, we deduced that it was pretty much a "perma-hat" situation for John in most of 2012, with the accessory popping up in his "Shadow Days" cover art, and HERE, and HERE. But then along came John's relationship with Katy Perry, and John's long hair and hat magically disappeared!! Need proof? Over the course of many months, a hat-less John was spotted escorting a uni-colored sweatsuit wearing Katy Perry out of his apartment, backstage with Katy Perry at "A Christmas Story: The Musical," whispering into Katy's ear at the Grammys, and most importantly, having a romantic, no-hat-anywhere dinner on Valentine's Day. Now, word on the street is that Katy and John have called it quits, and whaddya know?? That cowboy hat comes RIGHT back out. (Are we detecting a pattern here??) Moral of the story? If the reemergence of John's cowboy attire doesn't mean he's a single bro, then we don't know what does! 

Photo credit: Pacific Coast News

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New Video: DeLon, 'Pretty Girls'

DeLon seduces his lady in a lavish mansion in his "Pretty Girls" video.

Does anyone know how to get Los Angeles rapper DeLon's day job? In his latest clip for "Pretty Girls," he's rhyming in an ENORMOUS mansion and wearing a super dapper suit, while his model girlfriend CANNOT decide which designer dress to wear (been there, girl... except for the designer part). With his rapid-fire switching from rapping to singing that reminds of Drake and vocals that recall John Legend, we can see why all the "Pretty Girls" would flock to DeLon.

Watch DeLon's "Pretty Girls" video after the jump.

In "Pretty Girls," DeLon's lounging on the couch while his girl models a flowing dress for him (#roughlife). After throwing on a suit and tie (and his lady finds the right dress following several attempts), they head to the estate's top floor for an exquisite, fancy dinner -- clearly this guy did not miss a single episode of "The Pickup Artist." When the nine-course (we're guessing) meal is over, DeLon and his lady find some space to dance, ie. a place where dude can bust out his best Omarion/Chris Brown moves. All and all, we have to say that's a pretty good date (as long as we're not paying).

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Downton's Hugh Bonneville would 'never say never' to EastEnders role

Hugh Bonneville stars as Robert, Earl of Grantham in the third series of "Downton Abbey". Photo: Nick Briggs / Carnival Films By Alice Vincent, Entertainment writer, online

1:40PM GMT 28 Mar 2013

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Cate Blanchett signs $10 million deal with Giorgio Armani fragrances

The Knowledge: Oscar-winning actress Cate Blanchett reveals her skincare secrets

Celebrity beauty contracts are showing no sign of abating as news was revealed that Hollywood big hitter Cate Blanchett has just signed a deal with Giorgio Armani fragrances.

Related articles Gwyneth Paltrow to launch blow-dry barThe Kardashian sisters launch a tanning linePrada Candy L'Eau the film, by Wes Anderson and Roman Coppola

And it's a bumper beauty deal. The New York Post reports that the contract was sealed for $10 million.

WATCH: Cara Delevingne becomes the new face - and body, of Burberry's new fragrance

Already the face of skincare brand SKII, it's surprising that Cate, one of the world's greatest beauties, hasn't been snapped up by a fragrance brand before.

READ: Cate Blanchett on how to simplify your beauty regime

But it's good news for Armani, who told the New York Post that its new signing: "epitomises the woman for whom I design." So now she can add his perfume to her collection of red carpet dresses, which she has been wearing for years.

IN PICTURES: Milan Fashion Week: Giorgio Armani autumn/winter 2013 in pictures

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Baroness Bakewell attacks Mary Berry in new row over feminism

By Telegraph Reporters

8:00AM GMT 29 Mar 2013

The Labour peer, 79, derided the Great British Bake Off hostess, 78, for her “stable and unchanging” opinions of the world.

In an outspoken interview with the Daily Mail, Baroness Bakewell contrasted the baking Queen’s comments about life with her own “whizzy” living.

“When I read that, I felt that Mary belonged in a completely different world,” she told the newspaper.

“What she said sounded very lovely and cosy and rural, and very stable and unchanging. I thought that was fine for her.

“But perhaps I have lived a bit more of a whizzy life out and about, and my life has been a little bit more rackety. Of course feminism has mattered a great deal to me and matters still.”

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She added: “I think Mary would expect to be paid a decent wage for the job she does and she would probably expect to be paid as much as a man. So to that extent she is a feminist without realising it.”

Renowned for her liberal attitudes towards sex and for an illicit affair with Harold Pinter, the Baroness was once known as the “thinking man’s crumpet”.

Her seven-year affair with the playwright occurred while they were both married. Twice divorced, she now lives alone in Primrose Hill, north London.

Her intervention came after Miss Berry dismissed feminism as a “dirty word” and insisted she did not want women’s rights.

She also admitted that she loved it when men offered to carry her coat. She added: “I’m thrilled to bits. I’m not a feminist.”

Baroness Bakewell insisted such gestures should be “common decency” for both sexes.

Miss Berry, a cookery writer who is one of three judges on the BBC Two show, has not responded to the comments.

 TV and RadioNews »UK News »Celebrity news »Culture News »Telegraph reporters »

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The Duggars Might Be Adopting Their 20th Kid

Because they’re the stars of their own reality show that focuses on their massive family, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar are generally regarded in the same company as women like Kate Gosselin and Octomom, who treat their vaginas like t-shirt guns. They also drag their litters around for the sake of making money, which is actually what (mostly) sets them apart from the Duggar family, as it consists of the aforementioned parents and 19 children. The Duggars have their own money, while Gosselin whores herself to Celebrity Wife Swap and Octomom just whores herself.

That doesn’t mean that the Duggars are good people or even sane. After all, any family with 19 fucking kids is either run by nymphomaniacs or Roger Goodell. But love

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Katie Price Is a Bangable Pink Furry

Katie Price dressed up as a pony for the launch of her KP Equestrian wear. I guess the product name Attention Whore Katie Price Crappy Horse Clothes didn’t make it out of consumer testing. Either way, I don’t know how Katie dressing up like a retarded pink filly will help sell her regal sports clothes. I guess there are some women out there who will buy whatever Katie hocks. Just like when Kim Kardashian pimps a douche on Twitter, there are 117,000 women out there who run to the CVS to purchase the same douche because something in their brain tells them they want a love hole that smells like Kim Kardashian’s. Nobody can think that one through rationally and still decide to buy. Still, I guess some ladies will subconsciously connect, ‘Jeez, Katie Price used to screw that hot Latin male model. I bet if I wear her Attention Whore Crappy Horse Clothes, I too will have sex with Latin male models.’ I just don’t get it. I see Katie Price dressed like a pink horse and all I feel is the shame of a lonely horse wrangler out on the prairie knowing what’s going down after the campfire dies out. Whinny my name, Katie.

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Halle Berry Boobs Never Age

Halle Berry doesn’t have real tits, but she has spectacular tits, which is more important than real. What truly is real in this world? Organic food? It’s grown with shit, literally. Reality TV is entirely fake. The last bout of ‘real love’ I experienced ended in her sleeping with my favorite bartender (the worst, because you can always find a new girl, but finding a new favorite bartender is a pain in the ass). There is no real. Just good and bad. And Halle Berry has good.

Photo credit: FameFlyNet / Splash News


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Paris Hilton Swatted (And Not For Cash This Time)

Paris Hilton is the latest victim in one of the stupidest practical jokes going on in Hollywood — swatting. Some tool cals the cops and says somebody is breaking into a celebrity home and they send the SWAT team out in choppers and fighter jets to contain the situation. I guess it’s sort of kind of funny except that the celebrity is never really home and the cops are the ones who get pranked and waste their time while Paris just goes on snorting lines at a D.J. show in Miami completely unaware. So perhaps the most poorly conceived practical joke ever. Wake me when a prank results in an assault rifle being put to Paris’ lazy eye. That’d be funny.

Here’s one of Paris’ incredibly crappy music videos, in case you ever start feeling bad for thinking mean thoughts about her.

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Bieber Spits on the Dick Next Door

Justin Bieber continues his Napoleonic antics by spitting in a neighbor’s face and threatening “I’m gonna fucking kill you.” It seems that the world’s most famous singing lesbian got into an altercation with the guy who lives next door in the exclusive Calabasas neighborhood after coming back from performing his shitty music overseas. The guy confronted Biebs about driving around their rich barrio too fast in his brand new Barbie Dream Ferrari. He also said that the rent boys and Disney rejects that hang out with Biebs were making a lot of noise while he was away. The dude called the cops and said that Biebs hocked a globber in his face and threatened to kill him in his high pitched gelding voice. Now, I totally respect trying to rip off Justin Bieber, but I wonder if there isn’t a bigger issue at stake here. Namely, would you want to seem like you were intimidated by Bieber?

Claiming assault and battery after getting into an altercation with Justin Bieber is like crying out in pain after being licked by a kitten. If Justin Bieber had threatened me with death by his power fists, I would be struck with a serious moral and manly dilemma. Do I swing at him, shattering him into even smaller pieces and end up being sued into oblivion by his army of lawyers? Do I ignore it for the pathetic flailing of a little girl on her period that it probably is? Or do I do what this neighbor seems to be trying to do and get money from him? Yep, door number one. I’d clock him. It’d be worth the next thirty years of legal misery.

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Holly Peers Seems Nice

My friend sent me an email saying I needed to check out this model named Holly Peers. Now, ‘check out what I just saw’ emails between dudes went away the minute the first guy realized that just because he was talking on a computer didn’t mean he could act like an excitable girl having Starbucks with her gal pals. Besides, since YouPorn added its video recommendations module, what’s the point of ever hearing a friend recommendation ever again. Porn site algorithms know you better than yourself. Yes, I do like situations where ropes are used, in a gentle manner, to bind naive girls being seduced by older neighbor ladies whose husbands are at work sleeping with the secretary. How did you know? But, I still opened my friends email, because I really don’t get that many that don’t have ‘You Are Past Due…’ in the subject line. And I’m glad I did. Because Holly Peers is pretty spectacular. But she just does R-rated stuff. And, I guess what I’d kindly ask Holly to consider is being that firmly, but gently bound naive girl in a more adult video situation. And don’t think I won’t find my parents VISA card number to pay to watch you in that performance. I will. Until mom finds the bill and yells at dad over the porn addiction he doesn’t really have.

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Bill Gates Wants To Make A Windows 95 Condom

Would you wear a Windows condom? I wouldn’t either. But it’s coming your way. The Bill and Melinda Gates foundation has put out word that they want to create the next generation of jimmy hats. They argue that the overall design and composition of the latex sombrero hasn’t changed since the 60′s. The idea is that if they feel more natural people are more likely to wear them. While I guess they have their hearts in the right place, I wonder if it will work. Firstly, what the fuck does Bill Gates know about making rubbers? He made his billions selling a shitty operating system that he largely ripped off from Apple and the QDos system designed by Seattle Computer products. You don’t want a rip-off condom any more than you want IE8 .

Bill Gates is shocked that only 1 in 7 copulations occurs on this planet with a prophylactic in place. Shocked as the world’s richest dweeb may be, there is no way that even a space-age condom will ever feel like you are rubbing “meat on meat”, (a disgustingly evocative term I heard in South Africa). I know lots of people, men and women, who absolutely refuse to wear them because it just isn’t the same. I wear them because I don’t want any rugrats running around and you should definitely wrap that shit up when having a one night stand with that slutty waitress you met at Applebees (and she certainly feels the same about banging a poor-tipping slob who orders the $9.99 rib special and water).

25 years later and Kool Moe Dee still has the best cautionary rap tale about unprotected sex with women.

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Design the Next WWTDD Banner! Win $666! Get Laid!

I was just thinking today, what is it that people really love. I came up with money and Breaking Bad. I can only get you one of those.

We’re going to be updating the WordPress formatting on the site soon, some very modest shit, but I also want to update the look of the header banner.

If you have a little creative in you and a borrowed version of Photoshop, enter your submission for the new WWTDD.com banner. Creatively, consider it completely wide open. Don’t even feel obliged to include the full text name, or do. Keep the old logos, or don’t. I will chuckle at the people who send me ‘Fuck You, Cunt Face’ banners. You will not be winning Satan’s gold.

Please do make sure:

Submissions are in .psd file format, sized 850 x 155No use of copyright or trademarked images or shit that doesn’t belong to youYou understand that whatever you submit may actually end up winning and we will own it and it will be used on the site in return for your cash winningsYou may not win and that sucks and you’ll have to deal with your own bitter disappointment

We’re going to take our favorites after a week and let you guys vote on the winner. That’s democratic for you and lazy for me, so it fits my m.o.

Use the contact form to send in your submissions. You can also include a little note about how you need the money to keep your grandmother’s dialysis machine pumping, but I won’t believe you even if it’s true, and that will hurt even worse.

Good luck!

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New Video: Passion Pit, 'Cry Like A Ghost'

Passion Pit throw a creepy forest dance party in their "Cry Like A Ghost" video.

When Passion Pit isn't making collabos with Juicy J (we're STILL not over that), the electro-pop group is busy filming its own heartfelt and unique videos ("Carried Away" and "Constant Conversations" to name a few). Their latest clip for "Cry Like A Ghost" falls into the latter category, featuring a young woman having a one-person dance party in a creepy forest as she thinks about all of her ex-boyfriends (otherwise known as our typical Friday night). It's basically like if Tim Burton decided to curate Ultra Music Festival and schedule it on Halloween.

Watch Passion Pit's "Cry Like A Ghost" video after the jump.

Taken from Passion Pit's Gossamer album, "Cry Like A Ghost" kicks off with a young girl dashing through a dark, wooded area and tripping (which is generally how most horror films start). But instead of a crazed, axe-wielding weirdo emerging, homegirl just starts busting out dance moves, which... Okay? Sometimes you need to dance like no one is watching, and a scary, nighttime forest is JUST the place to do that. Set to a jerky, hand-clapped beat, "Cry Like A Ghost" culminates with all of the girl's one-time boyfriends dancing beside her. Not a bad way to achieve closure, right? Maybe we should throw our own all-exes dance party! Except...not. #EasierSaidThanDone

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Star Spotting: Britney Spears Gets Another (Better!) Wax Treatment (PHOTO)

Britney Spears' new wax statue nailed everything... Well, except maybe her hair color!

Guys! Britney Spears got another wax treatment! (Not that kind of wax treatment...weirdos.) Yep, Madame Tussauds has unveiled a brand-new Britney wax statue in New York City, and we know what you're thinking: This sculpture looks kiiiinda like that Britney wax figure hanging around the Sydney airport (again, WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?!). But unlike that should-be-birthday-candle horror show, NYC's version has done us proud. This new statue ALMOST looks as flawlessly gorg as the real B. Spears! Now all Britney needs is a box of Tic Tacs, and we'd be completely stumped as to who's real and who's fake.

The "Scream & Shout" singer's new statue was snapped "walking" the red carpet at Time Square's Madame Tussauds, and now we're wondering just how many tourists mistook the faux Brit for the real person -- it's so LIFELIKE (down to the classic Britney head tilt/hands-behind-the-back pose). There is one major design flaw, though -- her hair should be brown! But we're working hard to accept this statue as it is, because honestly, anybody who successfully attempts to recreate a world-renowned pop star like Britney has our undying respect. We're totally willing to look past the whole "Isn't she brunette in real life?" thing and peg it as "artistic interpretation." Even if it is KILLING US.

Photo credit: Getty Images

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Star Spotting: Ke$ha Is ALMOST A Girlie Girl At LAX Airport (PHOTO)

SO close to being girlie, Ke$ha. SO CLOSE.

Look, we're not saying that Ke$ha dresses like a full-on bro or anything, but we ARE saying that she's not generally the most girlie girl on the block. (Read: The last time we saw her was when she was bodysurfing over a crowd of sweaty strangers at a Vegas nightclub, you know?) That said, K-dolla has gone almost fully girlie in a floral frock while arriving at LAX airport on her way to Miami. Then of course, you look down to discover she's wearing a pair of Converse sneakers, but maybe that's just her thing! Or, perhaps she was working so hard on her upcoming "Ke$ha: My Crazy Beautiful Life" docu-series that she just didn't have time to find anything else. Yep, that's definitely it.

That said, we may be calling the "C'Mon" singer out for her interesting shoe-choice (maybe the Illuminati doesn't approve of kitten heels?), but we gotta commend the gal for keeping it simple and comfy at the airport. Because, as we ALL know, NOBODY, (not even the queen of airport couture, Kim Kardashian), is exempt from a little thing we like to call "airplane bloat." Not sure what we're talking about? Let's just say that wearing form-fitting, high-waisted jeans gets REAL old about 10 minutes after you've reached "cruising altitude." We get why you're keeping it simple, girl.

Photo credit: Splash News

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Jessie Ware, Jessica Sutta, Vanessa Hudgens + More: 5 Must-Hear Pop Songs Of The Week

It's Tuesday! Time for another round of "5 Must-Hear Pop Songs of the Week"!

This week's roundup features sweet, sweet former Sugababes crooning, the return of a Pussycat Doll, and an outrageous new anthem from a certain Disney princess gone bad. Spring break forever!

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The Buzz On: Shugo Tokumaru

Shugo Tokumaru plays more instruments than you.

Japanese singer-songwriter Shugo Tokumaru's been making albums since 2004's Night Piece, but the pop-minded musical genius started turning heads in recent years with his cover of Peter Bjorn and John's "Young Folks." His latest is this year's In Focus?, a 15-track collection that layers instruments like noodles on lasagna -- and yes, we meant "genius." One listen to Tokumaru's kaleidoscopic songs and it's clear he's operating on another level: "Katachi" alone combines acoustic guitar and vocals with mallet percussion, whistles, accordion, and more intricate examples we can't quite identify. If "Toy Story 4" needs a setting, Tokumaru's studio sounds like the place. His musical range comes packaged with his gift for sun-kissed melodies: Tracks such as "Decorate" and 2010 single "Lahaha" are as exuberant as a puppy chasing a butterfly.

Listen to Shugo Tokumaru after the jump.

With his fifth album out now on Polyvinyl, Tokumaru seems ready at last to conquer the rest of the world. He made his first SXSW appearance last week, playing parties for Brooklyn Vegan, We Listen for You, and even at the convention center Day Stage -- a spot also occupied by the likes of Vampire Weekend and Iron & Wine during the marathon music festival. Seeing Tokumaru play isn't unlike watching a whirlwind. By the time you've caught on to his first riff, he's already clicked his loop pedal and started adding the next. Good thing he writes ballads, too.

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Buzzworthy Obsession: New Empire, 'Relight The Fire'

Australia's New Empire get inflammatory in their "Relight The Fire" video.

You've really got to hand it to rock trio New Empire in terms of dedication. Their instruments are literally exploding into flames in the video for "Relight the Fire," but somehow they manage to finish the song anyway. That's professionalism right there. The band, who are stars on the rise in their native Australia, have just announced a return to the States on this summer's 2013 Warped Tour.

Watch New Empire's "Relight The Fire" video after the jump.

The trio of old friends -- Jeremy Fowler, Kyle Lane, and Kale Kneale -- who've been performing together since 2005, have put together an impressive résumé since the release of their debut, Come With Me Tonight, in 2008 and its follow-up, Symmetry, in 2011, including dates with Good Charlotte, Owl City, and Switchfoot. "Relight the Fire," New Empire's latest single, came out earlier this year, but, like the song itself, it's a slow-building epic that's a bit more dynamic than many of the songs on Symmetry, with its sensitive-guy piano-balladeering on songs like "Ghosts" and "Staircase." But strident, careening-guitar-forward tracks like this one and "Worth the Wait" make them seem like a natural fit on Warped Tour.

As if that all sounds, you know, a little too sensitive, the video dudes things up a bit -- this is Australia after all -- with some truly epic wood-chopping. Never have outdoor chores looked so appealing. As for the song's titular fire, we're pretty sure they're speaking metaphorically, but maybe next time don't let anyone dance around all that dry wood with road flares if you want to avoid another instrument inferno. That can't be cheap.

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New Video: Yeah Yeah Yeahs, 'Sacrilege'

Yeah Yeah Yeahs tell a creepy story in reverse for their "Sacrilege" video.

When the Yeah Yeah Yeahs dropped their new song "Sacrilege" last month, we could hear the drama swell in the powerhouse indie-rock track. Now that the cut from their forthcoming album Mosquito (due April 16) has a proper video, we had NO IDEA how right we were. Starring model/actress Lily Cole, the clip unfolds a tawdry, creepy story of one woman turning a small town upside down. (Don't be offended if you live in a small town, it's just art 'n' stuff.)

Watch Yeah Yeah Yeahs' "Sacrilege" video after the jump.

In the beginning of the clip, Lily's in rather dire straits. She and a guy in a mask (I told you it was creepy) are about to be sacrificed by the vengeful townspeople. Then --

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Sofia Vergara is Blonde Now

“Blond ambitions!! Gracias to the amazing Kelly Klain I’m ready for summer!” Sofia Vergara tweeted along with the picture (left) of her new lighter and shorter hair. The Daily Mail says of her new do:

The Colombian actress new look features a dark blond base with lighter streaks that was cut and styled to have a shorter length of hair swept across her face.

I don’t know if it’s the angle or the lack of false eyelashes, but I wouldn’t have even recognized that woman as Sofia Vergara. Or an actual woman. It looks a lot like Skid Row’s Sebastian Bach circa 1989.

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Heather Graham Has Still Got It and Other News

Heather Graham is 43 years old and she looks amazing. Maybe the hara-kiri I’d planned for the eve of my fortieth birthday is a tad premature. She has definitely given me something to think about.

Scraps and internet leftovers…

This is why you don’t do live newscasts by un-neutered dogs. (Mandatory)

Kim Kardashian’s maternity clothes get worse the bigger she gets. Her outfit looks like something from the Blanche Devereaux Afternoon Garden Party Collection. (Celebitchy)

But Blanche Devereaux wouldn’t be caught dead in today’s ugly Kim K dress. (Moe Jackson)

Britney Spears in a bikini… and it just makes me miss the old fat crazy Britney who spoke with a British accent. (DS)

Kristen Stewart looked like a Bill Blass necktie at the KCAs this weekend. (Hollywood PQ)

If you want to watch Miley Cyrus flail her buttocks for two solid minutes, today is your lucky day. (The Blemish)

In honor of the upcoming holiday, 21 pics of the creepiest Easter Bunnies of all time. (Caveman Circus)

Today just seems like a Sienna/Burnt Umber kinda day. (Modavanti)

Hugh Hefner claims to have bedded a thousand women. But how many women have diapered him before he’s bedded? That’s the real question. (Evil Beet)

Hayden Panettieree caught giving her ex vertical mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. (Hollywood Rag)

Jared Leto is never more hilarious than in gif form. (Socialite Life)

The author behind “Friday Night Lights” admits that he’s gay and addicted to shopping. (Jezebel)

James Franco reveals why he and everyone else hates Anne Hathaway, but doesn’t explain why it is I and everyone else hate him. (Pajiba)

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Katy Perry is Single Again

If your walls are weeping Massengill, it’s probably because 28-year-old Katy Perry and 35-year-old John Mayer broke up again. Us Magazine says:

The high-profile pair began casually dating during summer 2012, and briefly called it quits back in August before reconciling the next month.

“It’s sad,” one pal tells Us, but cautions that it might not be a permanent break. “It’s not over until it’s over. You have to see how things play out… she’s leaving the window open.”

That’s a shame. They had so much in common, too. He loved boobs, she had boobs. I really thought destiny was on their side.

In honor of Katy Perry, I give you a panoply of hot pants:

!it: Bureau trouser shorts ($27)Trina Turk: Hotshot shorts ($226)Free People: vegan leather shorts ($64)Asos: sequin flower shorts ($39)

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Best Mug Shot Ever?

Yes. Best mug shot ever. A lawsuit was filed yesterday against Cleveland Browns star Desmond Bryant after he attempted to break into a neighbor’s house because he was so drunk he didn’t remember where he lived. The Mail Online says:

Bryant told police that he thought he was at his home when a taxi dropped him off after a night of drinking in Miami in the early morning hours of February 24.

But it wasn’t his house. It was the home of Isaac Bakar, a 43-year-old contractor who thought the massive athlete was there to rob the place.

Mr Bakar struggled to hold the door to keep the 6’6″ and 311-pound defensive lineman from entering while his wife called 911.

The Bakars charge that Bryant tried to break down the door, and even ripped off a door handle.

The paper reported that Bryant was still furiously punching at the door when cops arrived.

That must have been absolutely horrifying. Just imagine what it would be like to hear a noise at your door in the middle of the night and look out the peephole and that’s the face that’s screaming back at you in a blind rage. He’s Lenny from Of Mice and Men in the body of The Gimp from Pulp Fiction combined with the power of whiskey. That’s a pretty terrifying combination of IQ points, alcohol and brute strength.

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Lindsay Lohan Does the Neutral Trend

Head-to-toe neutrals don’t really work if you’re sallow and pasty like Lindsay Lohan. The color, or lack thereof, washes her out and gives her a Hepatitis C complexion. Wearing all-beige tells the world one of two things: 1) “My spirit is broken and I’m awash on a sea of disillusion and regret,” or 2) “I’m a zookeeper.” Very rarely does it say both.

Neutrals look best as an accent rather than the focus of an entire outfit — see the gallery above for more ways to do neutrals now.

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Robert Pattinon Signs a $12 Million Deal with Dior

Robert Pattinson earned a $12 million paycheck when he signed on as the petulant and forlorn face of Dior’s men’s fragrance, and now he’s pocketing another $4 million to be the birdy sunken chest of their menswear line. The Daily Mail says:

“The new advert

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Helpline set up for distraught Ryan Gosling fans

Ryan Gosling, who starred in Drive, has said he needs 'a break from himself'  By Bonnie Malkin

1:04AM GMT 28 Mar 2013

The so-called Gosline plays callers a "soothing" audio clip from Gosling's hit film The Notebook.

For a "standard fee" callers can listen to Gosling's monologue from the film; 'it's going to be really hard; we're gonna have to work at this every day, but I wanna do that because I want you. I want you. I want all of you, forever, every day. You and me, every day."

The line was set up after it emerged that Gosling had decided to step back from his film career.

"I think its good for me to take a break and reassess why I am doing it and how I'm doing it," he said.

"The more opportunities I am given the more I learn about how easy it is to

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Justin Bieber 'attacked and threatened his neighbour'

Justin Bieber in concert Photo: Rex Features By AP

10:45AM GMT 27 Mar 2013

No one was arrested and few details were immediately available. A representative of Bieber, Melissa Victor, did not immediately return a request from AP for comment.

Online schedules indicate the "Baby" singer is in the midst of a European tour and performed a show in Poland on Monday night.

Authorities were called to the Calabasas scene just after 9am on Tuesday, said Steve Whitmore, spokesman for the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department.

"There have been allegations made against Mr Bieber of battery and making threats," Whitmore said.

It was unclear who called authorities, and whether there might have been previous problems between the 19-year-old singer and neighbours, Whitmore said.

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In recent years, the Canadian singer has been constantly chased by paparazzi while publicly morphing from an almost angelic mop-topped teen to an adult battling a bad boy image.

Recently, Bieber lashed out at paparazzi and lunged at one photographer as members of the singer's entourage held him back.

Last summer, he got a speeding ticket while trying to avoid a bevy of photographers on a Los Angeles freeway in his distinctive chrome Fisker Karma.

He collapsed backstage during a recent London concert and cancelled a performance in Portugal.

Prosecutors decided against filing charges after the pop star was accused of kicking and punching a photographer outside a Calabasas cinema in May 2012.

Earlier this year, an ex-bodyguard sued Bieber for alleged assault and more than $420,000 in unpaid wages. Moshe Benabou claims Bieber repeatedly punched him in the chest after an argument over the singer's entourage.

Lately, the singer has taken to taking his shirt off in public places.

The investigation was first reported by TMZ.com.

Edited for Telegraph.co.uk by Barney Henderson

 Celebrity newsNews »World News »North America »USA »

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Mick Hucknall: my heroes and heroines

Mick Hucknall Photo: Jeff Gilbert By Mick Hucknall

12:15PM GMT 27 Mar 2013

Sir Matt Busby

As a boy growing up in Manchester, he was the glue to the city. He played for Manchester City, then managed Manchester United through a great period of trauma. He did amazing things for the city and I feel very fortunate to have known him.

Reginald Hucknall

My father was a single dad and brought me up by himself in the Sixties, which wasn’t the done thing at the time. He made me a cooked meal every day, did all the washing, all the cleaning, and had a full-time, six-days-a-week job.

The Queen

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06 Mar 2013

She’s shown immense dedication to her job and to the country. Her husband comes out with a comment that offends somebody almost once a year but she never puts a foot wrong.

Patti Smith

Her album Horses had a big impact on me as a 16 year-old. It is so brilliant and so consistent throughout. She’s a complete original.

Vivienne Westwood

Along with the Sex Pistols, she introduced a new way of dressing. Before that you had the hippy look and the glam look but she and Malcolm McLaren made something wholly original. She’s retained that attitude throughout her whole career.

Mick Hucknall tours throughout April. ‘American Soul Deluxe Edition’ is out now; mickhucknall.com

Mick Hucknall was talking to Jak Hutchcraft

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Ann Widdecombe: Christians are the butt of bad jokes

Nothing is sacred in The Book of Mormon in the West End: the writers use the presence of two Mormon missionaries in a Ugandan village as a pretext for jokes on many subjects Photo: JOHAN PERSSON By Ann Widdecombe

2:17PM GMT 27 Mar 2013

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Carol Vorderman, we feel your pain, but we applaud your bravura

Carol Vorderman will not, alas, be the last woman to succumb to the killer in killer heels Photo: REX FEATURES By Hannah Betts

7:30AM GMT 26 Mar 2013

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Victoria Beckham launches e-commerce site

Victoria Beckham attends the 2013 International Woolmark Prize Final at ME London on February 16, 2013 Photo: GETTY

For the first time, those wanting to snap up Victoria's Beckham's creations will be able to do so directly from the designer herself from today.

Related articles Victoria Beckham: 'I don’t have to work, I need to work'Victoria Beckham to launch collection of her greatest design hitsNew York Fashion Week: Victoria Beckham autumn/winter 2013Victoria Beckham to launch e-commerce site

Victoriabeckham.com has evolved from an online Lookbook to an e-commerce site housing the Spice Girl-turned-designer's handbags, denim, sunglasses and Victoria, Victoria Beckham line.

READ: Victoria Beckham plays material girl at New York Fashion Week

The site will be t he only place offering the 38-year-old's ICON line, a capsule collection of five of Beckham's most timeless dresses, ranging from

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Carol Vorderman: 'accident was no nose job in disguise'

By Andrew Hough

10:00PM GMT 26 Mar 2013

The television presenter, 52, called the Chris Evans breakfast show to insist she broke her nose in a fall and deny "stupid rumours" that she had cosmetic surgery.

The Loose Women presenter criticised Twitter users who suggested she had fabricated her fall down some stairs in “four-inch high black ankle boots with a one-inch platform”.

The Cambridge graduate, who previously presented Countdown, left a meeting in central London on Thursday when she decided to take the stairs instead of the lift.

Feeling cold, she put her hands in her pockets but “four steps from the landing” she slipped in her hurry and hit the wall “with full force”, she wrote in today’s Daily Telegraph.

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The host of ITV’s Food Glorious Food was taken to hospital by her boyfriend, ex-Red Arrows stunt pilot Graham Duff, and she had an operation to reset her nose.

She was ordered to rest at home in Bristol after the accident, which she admitted has left her feeling “a complete idiot” and cuts to her forehead and an eyelid that needed stitches.

She has also been forced to cancel TV appearances for the next few weeks.

Today, she was forced to issue legal letters to newspapers denying the “false” allegations that had circulated on the social networking site that she had received a “nose job”.

She also phoned Evans' BBC Radio 2 breakfast show to attack her critics and posted pictures of her nose on Twitter.

She told the host: “I sent out some photos after it happened just because there were some stupid rumours going round.

“You’ll see how the nose was bent immediately afterwards, so that’s proof there.

“I knew I’d broken my nose as soon as I hit it, so obviously I screamed. There was blood everywhere.”

After her call she also posted pictures of her injuries of her nose on her Twitter account – taken an hour after her fall – in a bid to quell the allegations.

Twitter: Carol Vorderman - Morning Tweet Peeps..... all good here..... think I must have nicest gang of followers in Twitterland... honestly... thank you xxx

Alongside the image, which showed a swollen, red nose as well as bruising around the eye sockets, she wrote to her more than 255,000 followers: “Red Nose Day? Ouch x.”

Twitter: Carol Vorderman - Red Nose Day?? Ouch x http://t.co/xNE8QgbXUg

Twitter: Carol Vorderman - An hour after my fall.... Sore and bumpy hooter..! X http://t.co/sL4cclvc9Z

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Point Blank director John Boorman says 'health and safety' would have ruined his films

John Voight in Deliverance Photo: WARNER BROS By Tim Walker

7:15AM GMT 27 Mar 2013

John Boorman, after being presented with a BFI Fellowship — the highest honour that the nation’s leading film organisation can bestow — told me that he counts himself lucky that he began his career when he did.

“Could I go off with a few actors into the wilds and make a film like Deliverance now?” the 80-year-old director mused. “If I were to, I’d have the health and safety people crawling all over me, and they’d make damn sure the film turned out mind-numbingly boring and uneventful.”

Jon Voight, the star of the great 1972 film, used to say that, while it helped to save his career, the eight weeks that he spent making it with Boorman came perilously close to ending his life.

Sophie’s choice

Sophie Raworth is training for the London Marathon in deadly earnest. The BBC newsreader pitched up at the Prince’s Trust and Samsung Celebrate Success Awards in a dress that she had rolled up in her rucksack for her eight-mile morning jog to work.

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“It was a bit of a military operation,” she told me. “I rolled it up and ironed it when I got to the office. You need to plan ahead.” She is raising sponsorship money for the Prince’s Trust by running her third marathon in a row, having raised £17,000 for Cancer Research and £9,000 for St John Ambulance in her previous runs.

She was coy about how generous her fellow newsreaders were being.

Ruta wants to keep her clothes on

It’s all very well for Rooney Mara to say she is not ashamed of showing off her body, but Ruta Gedmintas, left, the star of The Tudors, tells me actresses should put up some resistance when directors ask them to disrobe.

“It is something we are all up against,” she laments at the launch of the Biker Project at All Saints in Covent Garden. “But it is so much sexier to suggest things than to show them. I am not saying I would rule it out, but it would have to be really relevant to the story for me to do it.”

Follow Tim Walker on Twitter https://twitter.com/MandrakeTim

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Downton Abbey downer for Julian Fellowes

"It set tongues wagging last Christmas and if the trailer for this year’s Downton Abbey Christmas special is anything to go by, it will do the same again. "/

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Porn Wonder Woman Looks Better Than Regular Wonder Woman

The picture you see above is not from a multimillion dollar superhero summer blockbuster reboot of Wonder Woman. It is, in fact, a picture from the new porno Wonder Woman XXX: An Axel Braun Parody. By including the word ‘parody’ in the title, they can get away with completely ripping Wonder Woman. God bless America. The film stars the lovely and talented Kimberly Kane as the Amazonian heroine with a penchant for tying guys up and making them tell the truth, with her Olympian vagina. The first thought I had when I saw this picture, (OK, second thought), was, “Wow…that costume looks really good. Like, better than Hollywood good.” You may recall that last year David E. Kelley’s Wonder Woman pilot was dead in the water. Supposedly, it was fucking terrible. Now look at the photo below from that pilot, which was bought by NBC. The porn parody’s production values are waaaaayyyyy better. Mind you, this is for a porn movie where she probably won’t be wearing it for long. So, we now know what we’ve always known. Porn is better than stuff that isn’t porn.

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Bar Refaeli Might Cause A Civil War In Israel

By Travis

Bar Refaeli is just 27-years old and is already a world famous super model and well on her way to becoming one of the first billionaires that the profession has ever known, so she naturally has some people from her past that are jealous and spiteful of her fame. That obviously doesn’t include her ex, Leonardo DiCaprio, who spends his days semi-retired from acting and frolicking on his yacht with a dozen topless models.

But it does include pretty much everyone in Israel, where Bar was born and raised. It’s also where she was supposed to serve in the army like every 18-year old Israeli, but Bar knew she was too hot for that nonsense, so she married a friend in order to dodge the draft. Now that the Israeli foreign ministry wants to celebrate its hottest native daughter, the country’s army is calling bullshit.

“I wish to turn your attention to the negative message that could be delivered to Israeli society,” an army spokesman wrote to the foreign ministry.

The foreign ministry’s private response to the military was to mind its own business. As diplomats, though, their public reaction was phrased more carefully: “Bar Refaeli … is considered one of the most beautiful women in the world and she is widely recognized as Israeli. There is no reason to dredge up the past when we are dealing with a public diplomacy campaign of this kind.” (NBC News)

The Israeli army contends that Bar disqualified herself from being a spokesperson for the country by ditching her mandatory service, but the foreign ministry is taking the much higher road by simply pointing out that she’s incredibly attractive and men around the world might be dumb enough to visit Israel if they think that she’d sleep with some random fat schmuck.

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Tell Us How You Really Feel About American Idol, Dave Grohl

Ratings for the 12th season of American Idol, for the lack of a nicer term, suck whale balls and they have dropped almost every week since the debut. Last week, the show’s ratings were down 33% from the same time last year, so it’s safe to say that people are growing tired of Nicki Minaj lecturing drama club kids about talent. Or maybe they’re just tired of talent shows like The Voice or X Factor in general, but either way it seems that Dave Grohl is once again the voice of reason in an otherwise autotuned world.

“I think people should feel encouraged to be themselves. That’s what bums me out about those shows where people are judged so harshly by fucking musicians that hardly even play an instrument on their own fucking albums. It makes me really mad.”

He added: “I swear to God, if my daughter walked up onstage and sang her heart out and some fucking billionaire looked at her and said, ‘No, I’m sorry you’re not any good,’ I’d fucking throttle that person, I swear to God. Who the fuck are you to say what’s good or bad?”

Grohl also reckons the shows homogenise music so that “everyone sounds like fucking Christina Aguilera.” The Foo Fighters singer added: “The next time someone says you’re not a good singer say: ‘Fuck You’. I interviewed Neil Young and he said in his band someone said to him: ‘The band’s really great, but honestly you shouldn’t be the singer.’ If Neil Young had listened to that person then we wouldn’t have had any Neil Young.” (NME)

Can anyone even name the last five people who won on American Idol? Hell, the last three people? At least other countries are still trying to make their versions of American Idol relevant. Like, the Czech Republic, for instance. Last week, they had 19-year old pop singer Ewa Farna on, and she looks a hell of a lot more interesting than these Season 12 finalists. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but that Ewa Farna just grabs my attention.

(Photo Credits: Getty)

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Britney Spears Rare Bikini Show

There comes a time in every suburban mom’s life when she says, ‘What the fuck, I’m wearing that bikini to the beach today’. I’m mostly guessing, I have no clue how suburban moms think outside of becoming moist over the thought of snapping up 100-ct packs of frozen Bagel Burrito Dogs at Costco or ensuring school counselors that their disaffected teens are not attending impromptu rainbow parties in the dusty garage where the auto shop used to be. But I’m guessing for Britney Spears it’s a big moment to whip off the clothes at Malibu down to nothing but a bikini. You know everybody on the beach is looking. Not to mention a dozen dudes with long range lenses along the bluff. And, when you consider the fact that not long ago Britney was locked in her mansion with guns, her kids, and a whole f-load of voices in her head, yeah, she’s holding up.

Photo credit: FameFlynet

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British Girl Gets New DD’s from British Government (VIDEO)

03.26.2013British Girl Gets New DD’s from British Government (VIDEO) By Jack

Would you be OK with your tax dollars going to provide big beautiful fake breasts to members of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee? Yes? Then you should move to jolly ‘ol England! It all started when a chick named Josie Cunningham decided that she couldn’t live with her tiny tits anymore. She wants to be a model and they tend to have larger udders than a 12 year old boy. But how is she going to pay for a

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Jay-Z Orders Up a Private Boys Club with Just Justin

I’m so pro-gay rights I shit rainbow colored poop like a My Little Pony, but there’s something fishy if not swishy about Jay-Z’s plans for the “private gentlemen’s club” for himself and Justin Timberlake backstage for the pair’s upcoming “Legends of the Summer” tour together. No girls allowed.

Jay-Z is hiring a professional cigar roller to accompany them on tour and roll cigars in their backstage gentlemen’s room. What the fuck does H.O.V.A. need a professional cigar roller for, you think that man don’t know how to roll his own blunts by now? Unless there’s some Lewinskys in the room for a little Churchill fun time, Jay-Z’s plans for a private gentlemen’s room sounds gayer than leather chaps on a waxed ass.

I get it, you bros want some time away from your yapping famous wives on your big manly man tour and you’ve got money to burn. All I’m saying is, shouldn’t guys with time away from their wives be banging other women? We ladies dont’ like that shit, but at least we understand it. Guys only rooms? That gets us thinking we’re one phone call away from bailing your ass out of jail following a vice raid at a local glory hole.

“Yeah I’m out that Brooklyn, now I’m down in TriBeCa, right next to DeNiro, but I’ll be hood forever.” Hood? You misspelled “dandy,” Jigga.

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Micaela Schaefer Paints Her Eggs for Easter

When we hate a girl who is dying for public adoration, we call her an attention whore. When a hot girl we likes pulls much of the same shit, we just watch and applaud and call her daring. I like German model Micaela Schaefer. She’s daring. She likes to get butt naked in public in places like Berlin where you can pretty much get naked in public and nobody harasses you because it’s Germany and tits in public don’t hit their top 10 concerns list. I wish the U.S. were the same, but unless you’re a fat lady hobo with bed sores, flashing your bare cans in public will get you arrested. We might just have it backwards.

Micaela painted her tits and went to the Brandenburg Gate holding a bunny in celebration of Easter. Or maybe she was just showing the bunny where babies come from, which would be a little joke between species. Either way, she wants attention and who’s going to be the first guy not to give it to her? Not I.

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Lululemon Asking Ladies to Bendover

Lululemon, the guys that made both your girl’s sexy yoga pants and your mom’s dumpy sweat pants, are in a shitload of trouble because a batch of their yoga pants went out that were more sheer than normal. It seems that some women were showing upward beaver while doing downward dog. The company offered a recall in which you could exchange the peek-a-boo pants or get your money back. Only, how do they know that you have one of the malfunctioning pants and not a normal pair of teal-colored $90 exercise garments? By asking you to bend over in the dressing room to see whether the salesperson can see your lady junk, of course!

Lots of women were outraged that they were asked to do this. But the command came from the überlords at Lululemon. Their CEO, Christine Day said, “The truth of the matter is the only way you can actually test for the issue is to put the pants on and bend over.” Indeed. Maybe there is a better way to know which pants are defective like looking up the unit number or something, I don’t know. What I do know is that pervs with yoga pant fetishes will be turning in their Lululemon sales associate applications in droves today. I applied this morning. And got new glasses.

Here’s a bunch of celebrities with camel toes showing through the original strength yoga pants. Which just goes to show the power of a vagina that wants to be seen, not just heard…

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Kaley Cuoco Still Has Admirable Boobs

I used to love Kaley Cuoco. But something is happening that I’m none too pleased with. Kaley Cuoco is getting less hot. I’m thinking maybe it’s me. Perhaps you can only stare at a woman’s chest for so long before you become apathetic to her looks. I’d like to think not, but that could be some male-mating predisposition to keep the genetic pool diverse. Or maybe Kaley’s just getting less hot. She’s showing her boobs more lately, which could be a sign she’s sensing the same thing.

Photo credit: Getty Images


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Ashley Sky Is Less Modest Than You Never Thought

Ashley Sky either came from Brazil, or suburban Cleveland, depending on who you believe, but she’s hot and she turned herself into an Internet star. She’s like a 2013 version of Cindy Margolis I suppose, but you don’t have to sit on a 14K modem to wait to see her showing off her body. She’s everywhere.

For his part, Terry Richardson has a habit of getting girls nude or almost nude in his studio and shooting them. He also gets paid a ton of money to photograph girls like Kate Upton for GQ. I could call him all sorts of names, but I’m mostly just incredibly jealous.


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Karrueche Jets Out The Club When Rihanna Arrives, Gives Real Talk About Her "Highly Emotional" Love Triangle

This past Sunday in L.A., insiders revealed to us that Karrueche Tran jetted from a club just to avoid Rihanna.  And can we really blame her?  Deets inside, plus her interview where she tells all about her, Chris Brown & Rih's love triangle....

With all the sometimes immature back and forth amongst Chris Brown, Rihanna and Karrueche Tran, it's about time we heard things straight from the source's mouth.  At least from one of them.  And we get the real deal without the passive aggressive general twitter attacks.

But first, we've learned that while both Rihanna and Karrueche were spotted leaving the club My Studio in L.A. Sunday night, it was all for a reason. 

Karrueche hit up My Studio as one of her first stops of the night.  No more than half an hour before she got word that Rihanna was also in attendance, she decided to jet.  She then called up her good friends Christina Milian and Seiko Huffman for a girls night out at Greystone Manor (pictured above at the party). The trio drank it up as T.I., Tiny, and Kenyon Martin were all there too celebrating JL Nights and Team Hennessy's first Greystone Sundays of the year. 

She tweeted “what a night” the following day.  Of course.

 

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Kim Kardashian “Devastated” Reggie Bush’s Girlfriend is Pregnant?

(HollywoodLife)

Kim Kardashian is “devastated” and “very disturbed” that her ex Reggie Bush and his girlfriend are expecting a baby, according to HollywoodLife.

According to the webloid, Kardashian is “very upset” that Bush’s new love Lilit Avagyan is pregnant.

A supposed “source” claims, “Kim had pressured Reggie for a very long time to get married while they were together because she wanted to have a family with him,” but that Bush “wanted none of it.”

The “insider” adds that, “Deep down, Kim has always held out hope that they would end up together.”

“She feels it is a slap in the face that Reggie would consider having a baby with this woman when he wouldn’t with her,” alleges the so-called “source.”

Seriously?

NO.

A lot has happened since Kardashian and Bush broke up more than two years ago.

The reality star married Kris Humphries, filed for divorced, and is now seriously dating Kanye West.

In short, she’s moved on from Bush — just as he’s moved on from her.

In any case, a Kardashian family insider tells Gossip Cop, “She doesn’t care” about her ex’s baby news, adding that the reality star “is focused on her own life and relationship” with West.

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CLAIM: Tom Cruise May Leave Scientology, Katie Holmes “Would Reconsider” Split

(HollywoodLife)

“Is Tom Cruise Leaving Scientology To Win Katie Holmes Back?” asks HollywoodLife, which rarely has any answers.

Picking up a story from the British tabloid The People, HollywoodLife quotes a “source” as saying, “Now he’s lost the most precious thing in his life, he sees that his Scientology beliefs may not have hurt his box office but have ended not one but two marriages.”

(What a made-up quote!)

The so-called “source,” who claims Cruise feels like a “failure,” continues, “He has lost Nicole

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CLAIM: Kanye West Proposed to Kim Kardashian With “10 Carat” Diamond Ring

(HollywoodLife)

“Kanye West proposed to Kim Kardashian with 10 Carat Diamond,” blares a headline from HollywoodLife.

According to the clueless webloid, “Kim was spotted shopping at Christian Louboutin on Oct. 24, wearing a HUGE diamond ring on her pinky finger

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CLAIM: Demi Lovato is Engaged

(HollywoodLife)

HollywoodLife says it has “shocking new proof” that Demi Lovato is engaged.

Oh, do tell!

The webloid writes that while Lovato performed the National Anthem at the World Series on Sunday, “it was the diamond ring on her finger that had our attention!”

To bolster its claim that the “X Factor” judge’s bling was more than an ordinary sparkly bauble, it notes that “fans are abuzz on Twitter” that Lovato “may be engaged.”

RELATED –  Demi Lovato: Niall Horan Is “Not My Boyfriend”

“Some fans are tweeting that she may be secretly engaged to Wilmer Valderrama,” HollywoodLife notes.

So, because fans on Twitter think it is true, the alleged entertainment site believes it must be true?

Pathetic.

Anyway, Gossip Cop checked in with a rock-solid source close to the singer-actress, who assures us, “Demi is NOT engaged.”

Can’t wait to see HollywoodLies, er HollywoodLife’s next piece on Lovato based on stuff they read on a message board or heard on a school bus.

PHOTOS: Demi Lovato’s Style Evolution

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Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson’s “Relationship Threatened By Oscars?”

(HollywoodLife)

“Kristen Stewart & Robert Pattinson Relationship Threatened By Oscars?” asks HollywoodLife, which rarely has any answers.

The webloid writes, “There’s a strong possibility that Kristen may be nominated for an Academy Award based on her performance in On The Road. But will a win affect her relationship with Robert Pattinson?”

HollywoodLife goes on to note that an Oscar “win would mean better film roles, more choices and greater salary demands for Kristen. Her career would be catapulted in a new direction.”

“However, on the down side, there’s a chance a win could affect her relationship with Rob,” claims the blog, which further alleges, “There’s a possibility that Rob could feel envious of Kristen’s success.”

So, what evidence does HollywoodLife provide to support its claim?

The site notes that Reese Witherspoon and Sandra Bullock, both former Oscar winners, ended up divorced after their big wins — and that’s it.

RELATED – Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart Had

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CLAIM: Russell Crowe “Dating” Katie Lee

(HollywoodLife)

“Russell Crowe Dating Billy Joel’s Ex-Wife Katie Lee?” asks HollywoodLife, which rarely has any answers.

Picking up a story from the New York Post, the webloid writes that “Russell Crowe isn’t wasting any time” since his recent split from Danielle Spencer, allegedly having been “seen moving on with Billy Joel’s stunning ex-wife Katie Lee Joel.”

HollywoodLife reports that Crowe and Lee “were cuddling in front of a fireplace at the Greenwich Hotel on Dec. 9, and again later that day.”

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Barbara Palvin “Trying to Lure” Justin Bieber Back From Selena Gomez?

(HollywoodLife)

Victoria’s Secret beauty Barbara Palvin seems to be “trying to lure” Justin Bieber back from Selena Gomez, speculates HollywoodLife.

So, what has she done?

Did Palvin publicly confess her love for Bieber? Is she showing up at his house in the middle of the night?

Um… not exactly.

But the model did have the audacity to tweet a professionally-shot photo of herself wearing a bikini.

Seriously.

That’s what the shameless sensationalists at HollywoodLife are using for their latest journalistic travesty.

The webloid speculates that Palvin’s tweet was a reaction to Bieber sharing a picture of Gomez on Christmas via Instagram.

The site asks, “Do you think Barbara was trying to get his attention by tweeting a sexy pic of her own?”

No, we most certainly do not.

Palvin is a model.

Like a lot of professionals in 2012, she uses Twitter, among other social media platforms, to promote her work.

That is literally all that’s happening here.

But HollywoodLife is using whatever flimsy angle it can fabricate to create more drama in Bieber and Gomez’s relationship.

Sad, isn’t it?

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Taylor Swift and Harry Styles “Getting Married in a Week”?!

(HollywoodLife)

“Taylor Swift & Harry Styles Getting Married in a Week?” reads a headline from HollywoodLife, which tends to ask questions — yet rarely has accurate answers.

The webloid, which recently claimed Swift was just using Styles to make her ex Conor Kennedy jealous, now says the couple has “already bonded with each other’s families and might take it to the next level very soon!”

Um…

Where is this even coming from?

Well, HollywoodLife came across an Us Weekly story on Friday about how Swift and Styles are getting more serious.

The piece details how Swift “cleared her schedule” to meet her boyfriend’s family in England, and notes that she was supposedly overheard telling Styles’ sister that he’s “amazing.”

Then, in the sixth and final paragraph of the report, Us quotes a so-called “source” for the couple as saying, “Harry is totally in love. I can see them getting married in a week, just going for it.”

Of course, HollywoodLife being typically sensationalistic (and irresponsible), took that tiny nugget — which seems to be a figurative statement, rather than a literal one — and fashioned a totally exaggerated report around it.

Regardless, it is NOT true.

Swift and Styles are indeed getting more serious, but there is ZERO talk of marriage, despite the constant wrong reports from the tabloids.

HollywoodLies, er, HollywoodLife embarrasses itself yet again.

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Rihanna Sporting Engagement Ring at Grammys, “Engaged to Chris Brown”?

Engaged To Chris Brown?” writes HollywoodLife, which often asks questions and rarely has the right answers.

Jay Penske’s webloid reports that “a very suspicious diamond ring was spotted on Rihanna’s ring finger during the Feb. 10 Grammy Awards,” and notes that “while she wore a number of rings on the red carpet, Rihanna took all of them off later in the evening and left just a simple diamond band on her engagement finger.”

The bogus blog goes on to note that her jewelry set Twitter “abuzz” with rumors of an engagement, and even quotes speculation from random Twitter users — who have no connection to Rihanna or Brown whatsoever.

RELATED – Pics: Chris Brown and Rihanna Show PDA at Grammys

“Are Chris and Rihanna engaged?” the site asks its readers in its conclusion.

Allow Gossip Cop to do what HollywoodLies, er, HollywoodLife, so often can’t do — provide accurate information, not just meaningless sensationalism.

Rihanna and Brown are NOT engaged.

Gossip Cop has learned that the $25,000 ring was loaned to Rihanna by jeweler Neil Lane, who also provided other pieces to the singer for the Grammys.

And, a source close to Rihanna assures us the HollywoodLife story is… “ridiculous.”

Check out PHOTOS of Rihanna Performing at the Grammys HERE!

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Former Destiny's Child Singer LaTavia Roberson Is PREGNANT...Gears Up For Reality Show, Tell-All Memoir & Her Baby To Share Beyonce's Birthday!

Original member of Destiny's Child, LaTavia Roberson, is three months pregnant!  And her baby is due on her former group mate Beyonce's birthday. 

 

Deets inside, plus how LaTavia's gearing up for the spotlight once again....

31-year-old LaTavia Roberson has been staying fab, living in Atlanta and doing local appearances here and there since receiving the axe from Destiny's Child years ago.  But after all the drama, all of the original members (plus Michelle) are supportive and loving toward each other's careers.  And LaTavia's baby, according to her reps, is ironically due on September 4th....which is also Beyonce's b-day. 

So now that LaTavia is the second member of D-Child to have a baby, we're sure the girls are happy for her.  And her upcoming reality show and even her tell-all.

According to the press release, LaTavia's child's father is a "well known Alanta producer".  So this could be anyone.  We do know that for years she dated Jagged Edge member Brandon Casey, but that ended several years ago.

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Celebrity Scoops…updated 1.8.13

He is also in the headlines for heading back to court today, where he’s expected to agree to a plea bargain in his drunken driving case from November that had him arrested after falling off his motorcycle and failing a sobriety test. Really, Russia??? We’ll take him if he appears on

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CLAIM: Kristen Stewart Considers Herself “Single” and “Wants To Start Dating”

reads the headline of another completely fabricated story from Jay Penske’s HollywoodLife.

The webloid, which has a rich history of making up stories about Stewart and Robert Pattinson, manufactured another doozy on Friday, claiming,

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Celebrity Scoops…updated 1.9.13

but Matthew McConaughey says he’s gained 25 lbs. back and is only five lbs. away from his target weight. The new father of third child Livingston, who his wife Camila Alves gave birth to on Dec. 28, appeared on the New York Film Critics Circle Awards red carpet Monday evening, looking healthier than this image of him in the movie, but still a bit frail. When asked if he missed his bulker bod, he said,

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Celebrity Scoops…updated 1.14.13

debuted at the top of the box office this weekend, as the five time Oscar nominated Osama bin Laden raid drama earned $24 million. Opening in second was Open Road Films’ horror parody

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BLOG: Taylor Swift “Wants To Date A Guy From The Lumineers”

(HollywoodLife)

Taylor Swift “wants to date a guy from The Lumineers,” announces HollywoodLife.

Um…

The Lumineers is made up of five different musicians.

Does she have her sights set on someone specifically, or does she just want to date the whole band?

Perhaps even go on group dates, like on “The Bachelorette”?

Anyway, according to a made up source for the Jay Penske’s webloid, 

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Celebrity Scoops…updated 1.16.13

The interview will now be broadcast on Thursday and Friday on the OWN Network in lieu of just one episode.

In a surprising move, Oxygen Media has pulled the plug on

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